Pervert’s Library

By F. Valentine Hooven III
Published in 1993 by St. Martin’s Press

I was recently at an event where I found myself talking to a leatherman. Not only was he dressed in leather, atop his head was an amazing leather hat which perfectly framed his ountenance and vice versa. He was the personification of an idealized leatherman. As I complimented his hat, I mentioned that it made him look like he had stopped off the page of one of Tom of Finland’s drawings. He responded thoughtfully, “we all look like that on the inside.” It was a comment immense in both its beauty and insight.

If you only recently came out from under a rock and are completely unfamiliar with Tom of Finland’s work, he was, and still is, the best and most famous artist of gay erotica. His work is known for his highly stylized depictions of flawless hyper-masculine figures such as laborers and, obviously enough, leathermen.

Hooven’s biography traces Tom of Finland’s life beginning with his childhood in rural Finland to his death. I don’t know much about the background of this book’s author other than that his name shows up as the author of a book devoted to Beefcake magazines of the 50s through 70s. Were I more motivated, I might seek him out and find out more about him. Regardless, Hooven’s prose is reminiscent of the Weekly Reader. In some ways that easy writing style makes the book light and easy to read. In others, it makes the makes the book, and by extension, its subject seem a bit lightweight.

One of the book’s surprising highlights was the Tom of Finland’s service during World War II. I never really considered Finland’s participation in the war and the war’s affect on Finland before reading the book. While I don’t know enough about gay sexual expression during the war to accept or reject the veracity of Hooven’s descriptions of clandestine gay sexual encounters during the war, they were both plausible and compelling. The rest of the book traces Tom of Finland’s career as an artist from his work as a graphic illustrators to his transformation as a fulltime erotic artist, finally culminating in Tom of Finland’s recognition as an outstanding painter.

Though Hooven discusses Tom of Finland’s career as an advertising illustrator, a more detailed description of his advertising work would give the reader a broader picture of Tom of Finland’s artistic influences and background. Another detail of Tom of Finland’s life that seemed to merit more discussion was his relationship with his long term partner Veli. Despite being portrayed as a protective confidante when Tom gets cheated at business, Hooven depicts Veli as little more than a minor character in Tom of Finland’s life. Providing a more complete picture of who Tom’s life partner is and how he interacted with Tom would provide a greater insight into both Tom and his works.

Hooven also declines (fails?) to discuss Tom of Finland’s family. One wonders if he were out to them and, if so, how they reacted to his sexuality. Also, were they aware of his art and success? If so, were they proud or ashamed? If Hooven knows, he doesn’t tell the reader.

Even with these minor omissions, Hooven’s work provides a fine insight into the life and work of Tom of Finland and anyone interested in erotic artists, BDSM history, or gay and/or leather iconography will enjoy this book.

by Joan Kelly
Published in 2006 by Carroll & Graf

The subtitle of this book is also a fine synopsis as Kelly documents her discovery of her kinkiness. In short order she goes from a novice sexual adventurer to a somewhat jaded professional submissive.

This book opened my eyes to the mere existence of professional submissives. No doubt I’m naïve, but while I’m familiar the concept of a professional Master/Mistress (I’ve met more several), being a professional submissive always seemed too risky a proposition for anyone to pursue. At least that’s certainly the impression I have gleaned from repeated reading of memoirs of ordinary hookers and true crime books. Also, I can’t help but wonder where professional submissives would fit in the pecking order of sex workers. My best guess is that, like with mainstream sex workers, independents have a higher status than agency girls in turn who have a higher status than street workers. But that’s just a guess. At any rate, they certainly are much less visible than other categories of sex workers. If Kelly’s book accomplishes nothing else, she single-handedly has raised the profile of professional submissives not just in my mind, but the alternative sexuality consciousness. And for that feat alone she deserves kudos.

Readers hoping for shocking descriptions of sexual depravity won’t be entirely disappointed, but for the most part the interests of Kelly’s clients are, even to a naïve pervert like me, fairly tame. The most shocking part for me was her admission that seeing an extremely well endowed man excited her immensely. You’ll have to read the book to learn the rest, but it did confirm what I’ve always both suspected: despite women’s protests to the contrary, size really does matter.

Why the book is short on the lurid, I don’t know. It does not seem likely that it was because her clients simply lacked any other outlet for their kinky explorations. Nor do I think they were simply too shy to share their more extreme desires (it’s curious the kinks that people feel comfortable and uncomfortable sharing.) What seems more likely is that in order to engage in edgier play one needs to have a more intimate relationship with their partner than one can have in a professional session (I’m sure those familiar with the requests made of professional Masters/Mistresses might quibble with that point, but the difference is that it requires much less commitment to have something done to you, than it does to do to someone else. The notable exception is your average psychopath, but they are notoriously poor negotiators.)

I suppose it’s also possible that lurid descriptions of scenes aren’t included because Kelly simply didn’t include them perhaps out of the fear it would hurt her credibility. The credibility of a memoir is always suspect. People’s recollections tend to paint themselves in the best (or occasionally worst) possible light. This is especially true when for memoirs about illicit activities. That said, Kelly’s account seems fairly credible to me with one exception: early in her career as a submissive she describes a humiliating encounter with a client who cancelled a session appointment to play with a more attractive colleague. Even though I’m familiar with the magic of photography and makeup, looking at Kelly on the cover and in pictures from her book tour, provers her to be attractive. I find it hard to believe that she would passed over because of her looks.

The only flaw in this book is its extremely abrupt ending. While it was refreshing that Kelly didn’t proffer any regrets about her career turning the book into a morality tale or try to eloquently defend the choices she made, when I got to the last page I couldn’t help but wonder if there wasn’t a final chapter that was omitted. That aside, The Pleasure’s All Mine is a great book that every kinky person should read.

by John Douglas and Stephen Singular
Published in 2003 by Scribner

Written by former FBI criminal profiler John Douglas and true crime author Stephen Singular, Anyone You Want Me to Be traces the life and criminal exploits of serial murderer John “Slavemaster” Robinson. If you’re unfamiliar with Robinson’s crimes you can read about him here.

Because Robinson’s victims were like many of the submissive women I know and love, this book was difficult for me to read as I kept imagining one of them meeting a horrible fate. Anyone contemplating turning an online BDSM romance into a real life meeting would be well advised to read this book. That isn’t because meaningful, fulfilling, and loving relationship with someone you meet online aren’t possible, but because you really don’t know who is on the other end of the machine.

One thing that I did find particularly satisfying is that while Robinson was able to con many women he met online, one wouldbe victim he met in person had the foresight to set up a safecall. Though the book doesn’t refer to her actions by that name, that is clearly what the woman did. To be fair, despite her safecall she didn’t survive her encounter with Robinson completely unscathed - Robinson stole her toy bag. If you ask me, even if they hadn’t found the barrels filled his victims, stealing someone’s toybag is a crime that demands capital punishment. Kidding aside, it was this act that finally gave the police probably cause to arrest Robinson and led to the discovery of his victims.

Whether it is because, or in spite, of the fact that this book will haunt your thoughts for days after you read it, I can’t recommend it highly enough.

By Kay Reynolds Blair
Published in 1971 by Timberline Books

I’m not sure if this is the least dirty book in the Library’s holdings, but I am sure though that it is the only one my mother would approve of. I know this not because mom was fond of ladies of questionable virtue. Instead, I know this because mom bought this book while we were on vacation when I was just a wee dirty little boy. While a wiseacre might suggest that I was doomed from the start, I will think of it as a belated (and unmentioned) Mother’s Day present. But I digress.

Containing short biographies of the women who lived in and around the mining boom towns of Colorado after the Civil War, Ladies of the Lamplight is an entertaining remembrance of those women whose stories are often forgotten by more “respectable” histories and historians. My only complaint was that this little booklet was far too short – I would have really enjoyed more and/or longer stories of the ladies discussed.

Even though Ladies of the Lamplight isn’t dedicated solely to telling the stories of prostitutes in the old west, most of the women described were involved in prostitution in some form or fashion for at least part of their lives. Feminists reading this work might blather incessantly, as is their wont, about how that was indicative of women’s lower social status in the patriarchy and further decry that the world is works in much the same way today. But that misses the point entirely. What makes the women in Ladies of the Lamplight noteworthy decades after their passing wasn’t their flaunting of gender conventions, it was their flaunting of social conventions altogether.

Even though Poker Alice wasn’t associated with prostitution or bawdy houses (at least so far as this book is concerned) I couldn’t help but reproduce her photo. If Alice makes you horny, you are a sicker man than I. And for that, I praise you.