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Protocols: A Variety of Views
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Front cover for Protocols: A Variety of Views
Edited by L.C. Morgynn
Published in 2008 by The Nazca Plains Corporation
I really wanted to like this book for a couple of reasons. First, there are few good books about Master/slave dynamics and I hoped this work would turn out to be the exception. Secondly, I know at least one of the contributors personally and have met several of the others, so being able to write a thoroughly glowing review might save me from moments of social awkwardness. That said, as a reviewer, I am committed to the truth. From my standpoint, heaping praise upon a book that isn’t very good will inevitably be far more awkward than acknowledging the truth.
For those of you not familiar with Master/slave (M/s) relationships, allow me to explain my understanding of protocols. In general, protocols are guidelines that define how slaves in the relationship are expected to behave. They can take many forms and vary from person to person and relationship to relationship. For example, in some relationships, the master expects the slave to walk a few steps behind the master in public. For other masters, the expectation is that the slave will walk next to or even in front of the master.
Protocols benefit both masters and slaves. For masters, protocols allow them an opportunity to guide their slave and communicate which behaviors they expect their slaves to follow. For slaves, protocols serve as a constant reminder of the relationship, absolves them from having to guess about what to do to please their master, and allows them to focus their energies and attention to the master’s needs and desires.
As I mentioned, how masters implement protocols in their relationships varies from person to person. For some masters the slave is always expected to follow the protocol regardless of the situation, while others may only expect one set of protocols in the privacy of their home and another in the company of non-kinky friends and relatives. For example, the slave may be expected to always ask permission to go to the bathroom at home, but asking for said permission while in the company of master’s 90 year-old Baptist grandmother might make master less than thrilled. Similarly, protocols can change over time as the needs and abilities of all parties to the relationship change.
Just as there are differences in which protocols slaves are expected to follow, there are differences in how these things are communicated. Some masters communicate all of their protocol expectations verbally. Others have created handbook that explicitly state these expectations in whatever detail the master chooses.
As began reading this book, I expected the book to address different ideas of how to implement protocols, different notions of what protocols others use in their relationships, and so on. The topic of protocols is certainly a rich one and deserving of much discussion. Given that virtually every M/s relationship has its own set of protocols, one would reasonably expect a variety of different opinions on the type and variety of protocols that various masters use. Unfortunately, while the title promises “a variety of views” about protocols there is not any significant debate or points of disagreement between the various authors. Most of the essays follow the same format: the author defines protocols using a dictionary or similar source, relates how that definition applies to Master/slave relationships, and describes how they have instituted protocols in their lives.
As I read, I was reminded that I often lament that BDSM-related books include unnecessary padding. However in this case, I noticed that the essays in this particular book are far too brief and are annoyingly repetitive. Yet strangely, following the essays about protocols are essays about other topics and book reviews. While these essays are enjoyable to read, they don’t really directly relate to the book’s topic and give all of the appearance of padding. What we are left with is a mess.
This would have been a much better book if a single author (or perhaps the editor) had defined what protocols are and left the other writers to use that as a framework to either build upon or react against. Alternately, the editor could have asked the writers to write about a single aspect of protocols. Either approach would have resulted in a much more cohesive and informative work, because what we are left with feels like a wasted opportunity.
While this book was generally a disappointment, it did serve to make me think about protocols in my own relationship, and I still plan to read other books in this seemingly ubiquitous series with the hope that they are better than this one.
The Toybag Guide to Medical Play
01 year ago
Front cover for The Toybag Guide to Medical Play
By Tempest
Published in 2006 by Greenery Press
The easiest way for me to decide how much I like a book is my reaction to its length. A book that seems far too long, you can bet it is not a title that I enjoy. On the other hand, wishing a book were longer is a sure sign that it is good. In the case of The Toybag Guide to Medical Play, I wish the book were much, much longer.
This particular guide begins with a discussion on what medical play is. The book’s general premise is that medical play is a form of role play. I know lots of folks love role play, but I have never understood its appeal, and ordinarily a book with such a heavy role play focus would be a turn off for me. However, embedded in the text are wonderful tips for creating and using various medical toys. It also contains a nice introduction to such play options as enemas, speculums, vet wrap, and medical gags. Though it explicitly does not offer any instruction on catheterization, inflation, and sounding, it does inform the reader of their existence. It also includes an impressive list of references and resources.
First Hand: An Erotic Guide to Fisting
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Front cover for First Hand: An Erotic Guide to Fisting
By Tim Brough
Published in 2005 by the Nazca Plains Corporation
First Hand begins with Jack Fritscher’s fantastic introduction which is a history that discusses how fisting entered the “homo-masculine” mainstream in the 70s and early 80s. Fritscher mentions numerous books and magazines some of which I had never heard of, but now hope to add to my collection someday.
Tim Brough begins First Hand with a brief introduction to the anatomy of the anus. Following the anatomy lesson is an interview with a physician and his partner as they discuss fisting. While the discussion touches on a few medical aspects of fisting play, the conversation is mostly high praise for the virtue of fisting.
The third section is the most straightforward as it is a how-to on anal fisting. Beginning with the things one needs to have in their toybag for a fisting scene, the section talks about the fisting from the perspective of the top and bottom (or as the book describes it “pitching” and “catching”).
Following the how-to section are interviews with fisting fans and short blurbs where respondents describe their favorite scene and/or the appeal of fisting. Finishing out the book is a 45 page piece of fiction that I frankly did not bother to read.
The how-to section mentioned above consisted of only nine pages making First Hand the textbook example of BDSM writers’ tendency to pad their works, turning pamphlet length discussions into book length tomes. Unfortunately, this practice not only drives me nuts, the extra padding is a disservice to readers who want to learn more about a particular topic.
I have a suggestion for addressing this problem that I hope some enterprising BDSM publisher will steal and put into practice. Rather than having one author write a book devoted to a topic that can be covered in the space of a few pages, create an anthology where different writers can cover various topics using only the length necessary to discuss the topic. Not only would such a work solve the padding problem, the resulting book would become far more useful and indispensable. Alas, based on what I have seen of the BDSM publishing industry the only way such a book will ever see the light of day is if I do it myself.
As I try to review this book, I find myself stumped. On the one hand (pun intended), the book, especially Fritscher’s introduction, was fun to read, save for the fiction. On the other hand (pun intended), for a book subtitled “an erotic guide to fisting” it was not particularly informative and seemed lacking as a guide. Taken as a whole, while I enjoyed the enthusiasm evident in First Hand, there is not much else to recommend about it other than Fritscher’s introduction.
Toybag Guide to Dungeon Emergencies and Supplies
01 year ago
Front cover for Toybag Guide to Dungeon Emergencies and Supplies
By Jay Wiseman
Published in 2004 by Greenery Press
One thing about BDSM books that often frustrates me is that they often present a pamphlet-length topic in book-length form. The result is books that are bloated with asides, awful fiction, wordy prose, and the like that are not only annoying to read, they are also unnecessarily expensive.
In some ways, it is easy to understand why publishers would contribute to this situation given based on their not wholly unreasonable belief that book buyers are more likely to shell out the extra money for an entire book than purchase what might appear to be a flimsy pamphlet. I also think that the book length format appeals to the egos of BDSM authors given that, not only does a book seem a more impressive accomplishment than a pamphlet, but also a book writer is more likely to receive perks such as invitations to speak at BDSM events. I know for a fact that “so-and-so wrote a book” carries considerable cachet in someone’s stature within the larger BDSM community. Unfortunately, whether said book is any good is given scant attention.
In my view this is all very backwards. I would much rather spend $10 on a smaller pamphlet that contains only meaningful pragmatic information than shell out $16 for four times the verbiage and one-eighth of the utility. Also, why on earth would I be excited to hear an author speak when his book is meandering and self-important?
All of which is why I enjoy Greenery Press’ Toybag Guide books so much. Not only are do they distill a topic to the parts that are important to learn, they do away with much of the awfulness that all too often plagues BDSM-related books.
Despite the fact that I was annoyed and distracted by his excessive safety admonitions in SM 101, it is hard to imagine any author who is more suited to write a BDSM safety guide than Jay Wiseman. Here, Wiseman presents most everything a person needs to consider before, during, and after play in a concise easy to read manner. Not only is this is an enjoyable read before an accident, it remains a handy reference to have on hand after a situation arises that requires attention (though not every emergency situation lends itself to “wait let me read this book for five minutes before I act).
In fact this is so enjoyable, I have only one complaint which is that one of the folios, pages 27-58, where inserted into my copy upside down. But this printing error is a minor annoyance that can easily be overlooked.
Story of O
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Story of O front cover
by Pauline Reage
Published in 1965 by Grove Press
I’m not much for fiction. I know lots of folks like fiction, but time spent reading about events that didn’t happen seems like time squandered to me.
Story of O is well established as a classic work of both modern literature and erotic writing. This is fine and well, but not reason enough to make me want to read it. That the book had a substantial impact on the evolving definition of obscenity in the US and represented a significant milestone in the history of erotic publishing did not sway me to put aside my aversion to fiction and read it. What piqued my interest and made me track down a copy so that I could wallow in the promised debauchery was reading feminist critiques of the book, written before true identity of the pseudonymous author was revealed, which claimed that the contents of the book were so misogynistic that the author could only be a man.
I am sure that anyone reading the site is probably familiar with the overall plot of Story of O, so I won’t rehash it here.
Because the book was originally written as a series of letters to a lover, there is a certain discontinuity to the prose, most notably at the book’s sudden and incomplete conclusion. Depsite this, Story of O is a captivating book and deservingly one of the foundational cornerstones of modern conceptions of BDSM.