Front cover for Undinism A Study of a Bizarre But Not Unnatural Eccentricity Involving a Sexual Interest in Urine, Urination, Seeing Others Urinate, Etc.

By D.O. Cauldwell, M.D., Sc. D.
Published in 1950 by E. Haldeman-Julius

D. O. Cauldwell was a retired physician who became a prolific author and well known sexologist. This book’s publisher, E. Haldeman-Julius, was known for pamphlets covering a variety of taboo topics. These pamphlets were sold cheaply and were quite popular in their time. They were also printed using the cheapest materials possible. My copy is a good example of the lack of care given to printing. Even after it was trimmed, one of this book’s folios remained folded forcing a previous owner to tear the pages apart to read the text.

Undinism begins with an introduction that explains what undinism is and makes the point that it is a common part of sexuality. Cauldwell then discusses undinism as it relates to childhood, its causes, and undinistic voyeurism.

It is here that the book begins to get really interesting, as the rest of the text oscillates between letters, Cauldwell’s responses, and other undinistic topics. Cauldwell discusses such topics as undinistic sexuality among the elderly, urine drinking, golden showers, dominance, masochism, and so on. Surprisingly, voyeuristic interest in animal urination is a theme that appears repeatedly. One of the book’s best moments is Cauldwell’s admission that he unsuccessfully attempted to give his wife a golden douche. While many of Cauldwell’s ideas are antiquated, the views he expresses in Undinism are surprisingly progressive and frank.

Given the cultural and legal environment of the time this book was published, this book is surprisingly frank. While Cauldwell hides behind his status as an M.D., this book is clearly designed to titillate.

Front cover for The Toybag Guide to Medical Play

By Tempest
Published in 2006 by Greenery Press

The easiest way for me to decide how much I like a book is my reaction to its length.  A book that seems far too long, you can bet it is not a title that I enjoy.  On the other hand, wishing a book were longer is a sure sign that it is good.  In the case of The Toybag Guide to Medical Play, I wish the book were much, much longer.

This particular guide begins with a discussion on what medical play is.  The book’s general premise is that medical play is a form of role play. I know lots of folks love role play, but I have never understood its appeal, and ordinarily a book with such a heavy role play focus would be a turn off for me.  However, embedded in the text are wonderful tips for creating and using various medical toys.  It also contains a nice introduction to such play options as enemas, speculums, vet wrap, and medical gags.  Though it explicitly does not offer any instruction on catheterization, inflation, and sounding, it does inform the reader of their existence. It also includes an impressive list of references and resources.

Dr. Donsbach Tells You What You Always Wanted to Know about Prostate front cover

By Dr. Kurt Donsbach
Published in 1983 by The International Institute of Natural Health Sciences, Inc.

I know I am different from most people, but the first thing I wondered when I read this book’s title was whether I could trust a book with such a grammatically awkward title. (I can’t.) Actually, that was the second thing I wondered.  The first thing I wondered was if (and how) the book would handle the delicate discussion of the simple joys of having a finger up your ass. As much as I might like to claim otherwise, I honestly was not terribly surprised that the book did not discuss the joy of manual stimulation of the prostrate with a finger or other object.  I would have been more surprised if it had, and you could have knocked me over with a feather if it had delved into the obscure subject of prostate milking.

Thanks to the fine folks at quackwatch.org, I was able to learn everything I wanted to know about the storied career of Dr. Donsbach.  I personally am quite skeptical of alternative medicine, but even alternative medicine’s advocates would be well advised to be suspicious of the likes of Dr. Donsbach.

Even if I wasn’t able to read the quackwatch.org article, it takes little time for even a layperson like me to determine that Dr. Donsbach’s medical advice isn’t to be trusted as he devotes the book’s first half  to outlandish and unsupportable claims about the restorative properties of nutrition as it relates to prostate health.

The most entertaining portion of this book is Dr. Donsbach’s “Liver-Kidney-Bowel Cleansing Fast.”  Unless you enjoy scat play, I can’t imagine that anyone would ever attempt to follow this particular program.

Even though absolutely nothing in this book seems factually reliable, I did enjoy it thoroughly.  However, it was the same sense of enjoyment that I derive from driving by a car wreck.

Sex Disasters and How to Survive Them front cover

by Charles Moser, Ph.D., M.D. and Janet W. Hardy
Published in 2002 by Greenery Press

While most of Sex Disasters and How to Survive Them deals directly with the physiological side of sexuality, it does highlight a few emotional and legal issues that could arise from sex.

Written in an easy to digest “topic and explanation” format, the tone is light and easy to follow.  Unfortunately, the topics aren’t organized, so if one hoped to find to find information on a pressing issue they would be forced to hunt through the index. Worse still, many explanations lack the comprehension one wants in the midst of that sort of crisis.

To be fair some of the topics such as “My Girlfriend and I were making out and her Doberman snarled at me” don’t really demand a great deal of detail.  Then again, how likely is someone to seek out this book for that sort of advice?  Having been confronted with issues covered in this book after I read it, my answer is not at all.

I have high expectations of Greenery Press.  Their books tend to be the very best on topics devoted to sexuality (alternative or otherwise).  Maybe it’s just cynicism, but I suspect that if coauthor Janet Hardy weren’t the head of Greenery Press this book wouldn’t bear their logo.  Sex Disasters and How to Survive Them certainly is certainly the weakest of their titles I’ve encountered so far. (Note: little did I know that Intimate Invasions would make this seem like a modern classic. Oh well.)

If you happen to have had the sort of puritanical parents who refused to let you attend the fun portion of high school health class, then this book might be beneficial to you. Otherwise save your money and buy your lover something nice.

Sex Facts for Women front cover

by Richard J. Lambert, MD
Published in 1936 by Franklin Publishing Company

Like Sex Facts for Men, Sex Facts for Women is a condensed version of the Dr. Lambert’s book Sex and Marriage. This booklet is not only a vivid reminder of how society’s view of women’s sexuality has changed, but also serves as a near perfect example of how the traditional view of femininity severely limited women’s opportunities in society.

The first section is devoted to the “Anatomy and Physiology of the Female Generative Organs.” Amid the straightforward description of the female reproductive system, Dr. Lambert drops this bomb which made me pity Mrs. Lambert, “The important organs…are the uterus…and the vagina. Besides these there are others of less importance, as the clitoris and the vulva.” To be fair, he doesn’t completely ignore the clitoris. Later in the chapter he mentions:

“The clitoris has a tiny foreskin similar to that of a male, and like that of the male organ sometimes this foreskin is bound down too tightly and causes irritation. An operation similar to circumcision in the male must be performed to relieve the nervous irritation.”

I can’t help but wonder what exactly constitutes “nervous irritation.” I suspect it’s a condition found in girls who enjoy touching their nether regions and can’t help but wonder how many girls had their genitals mutilated for their “own good.”

The next section of the booklet is devoted to puberty and menstruation. It’s here that Dr. Lambert starts to really go off the deep end. He claims that at the onset of puberty girls should be protected lest they suffer from too much mental strain. He even recommends that a young woman be allowed to cut back on her studies so as to not “overtax her strength trying to keep up with her classes.” Parents are advised to expect their daughters to develop an interest in the “domestic arts” and encouraged to let their daughters pursue this interest even though the mother can do household chores more efficiently.

The other sections continue in similar fashion covering reproduction and pregnancy. Not surprisingly, unlike Sex Facts for Men, there is no mention of masturbation. Presumably that’s because he already addressed the matter with “nervous irritation.”

Aside from the vivid examples of the antiquated standards by which women were judged in decades past, there’s not much to recommend here.

Sex Facts for Men front cover

by Richard J. Lambert, MD
Published in 1936 by Franklin Publishing Company

A condensed version of the Dr. Lambert’s book Sex and Marriage, Sex Facts for Men begins with by lamenting that most young men get their sex advice from their ill-informed peers because their fathers are failing to do the job.  I couldn’t help but think of modern sex education proponents who, while agreeing with opponents of sex education in public schools that sex education should be taught at home, assert that sex education is necessary because parents are failing to provide that education. Unfortunately, that where any notion of progressive thinking about human sexuality ends as the bulk of Sex Facts for Men is squarely in the camp that sex is an act only reserved for a marriage between a man and a woman, and even in those circumstances they should be careful to not indulge too often.

The first section includes an explanation of the male reproductive system that reads very much like the chapter of my own high school health textbook, save for the fact that the exact function of some sex organs was, presumably, unknown when this book was written. Dr. Lambert claims in this section that the left testicle of most men hangs lower than the right.  I don’t remember that from health class.  A quick examination (life offers few opportunities to touch oneself and call it research, so you can’t fault me for taking full advantage of everyone that arises) reveals that, for me at least, Dr. Lambert seems to be correct.  Oddly, I find that reassuring.  I’ll have survey some of the women I know (they’ll tell the truth) and see what they report. For the sake of accuracy, I’ll ask that they exclude men who enjoy ball kicking as men who’ve been kicked in the balls repeatedly might tend to skew the results.

The word “continence,” like “licit” and “biotic”, is one of only a few words that one usually sees in a negative form (i.e. illicit, antibiotic), and as I was a bit confused when I began the pamphlet’s next section, “Is Continence Harmful?”  Adding to my confusion, incontinence suggests, at least to me, the loss of bladder or bowel control.  Though I hadn’t read the section, I felt fairly sure that Dr. Lambert wasn’t the sort of physician who would advocate showers either golden or brown. Still, I held out a faint hope that the doctor might make me reconsider the virtue of good old fashioned family values. Alas despite my domitable optimism, the good doctor merely takes to task those who claim that abstinence is harmful to one’s physical and mental wellbeing.

Dr. Lambert next turns his attention to offering advice to the bridegroom.  Having previously sung the praises of remaining chaste before one is married, his admonition that young married couples should avoid becoming consumed with pleasures of the flesh is, by current standards, comical. To help young married couples avoid temptation, Lambert suggests that young married couples avoid sharing a bed lest their rubbing bodies cause them to fall victim to temptation. Doing so will help men avoid becoming obsessed by sex to the detriment of their careers.

In the chapter’s closing paragraph, he does take a moment to advise men of the value of foreplay or as he calls it “wooing.”  Dr. Lambert notes that women require “wooing” not only during courtship, but before every sexual encounter. I’m sure most women will agree that in this instance he’s right. .

The final chapter addresses masturbation and promises an objective view free from stereotypes or shame. But since it bears the title “Self Abuse,” you can imagine that the doctor’s view of masturbation is anything but objective.  To his credit, Lambert does point out that stereotypes of self abuse leading to blindness or madness are false.  Still, he clearly sees masturbation as a moral wrong that cannot be tolerated. His obsession is so deep, that he abhors the natural curiosity toddlers have with their genitals.

Still if you lack common sense and wish to follow Lambert’s advice for redirecting masturbatory urges, you’ll want to make sure and not to administer corporal punishment on a young person caught in the act.  This is because not only will corporation be unlikely to dissuade them, it may give them a perversion even worse than masturbation: enjoy pain during the sexual act.

All-in-all, this pamphlet provides much to laugh at given how much our values have changed since it was written.  It’s a fascinating read and a good insight to the bad advice that many baby boomers received when it came to sex.  I can’t imagine anyone today finding this book an accurate assessment of sexuality unless they were of a militant protestant persuasion.  If you have a friend who is uncomfortable discussing sex with their teenagers, I’m sure the doctor’s complete book would make a fine gift but only to remind them of their responsibility to their children and all the horrible advice their children might receive if they neglect that responsibility.