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Teach Yourself Fucking
02 years ago
by Todd
in Multimedia
Teach Yourself Fucking front cover
by Tuli Kupferberg
Published in 2000 by Autonomedia
There are few self-instruction books are devoted to subjects which interest me. This is particularly true of the “for Dummies” series of books. I cannot imagine spending hard earned cash for a book that declares me a dummy. Where does one turn if the “for Dummies” proves to be too challenging? For Morons? For Nincompoops?
Given a choice, I think I would much rather my mother catch me having a lurid encounter with the family dog while I was clad in a nun’s habit than have the cable guy see any “for Dummies” book on my bookshelf. I don’t think I’m alone.
If you wonder if there is a “Sex for Dummies” book, be assured there is. It was written by sex educator Dr. Ruth Westheimer. As of this writing, it is in its third edition. While I am opposed to censorship, this is the one book I can make an exception for. After all, who on earth thinks it’s a good idea for dummies to fuck? If natural selection tells us one thing, it’s that when the stupid people spawn, it is likely their offspring will be stupid too.
Contrarians might suggest that as you teach the dumdums about sex you can also teach them about contraception, but I remain skeptical that they have the faculties to understand the importance of contraception and/or practice it properly. Nero may have played the fiddle while Rome burned, but Wiley Publishing seems to be actively fanning the flames of our society’s downfall.
What does that have to do with Teach Yourself Fucking? Not much really, despite its title, Teach Yourself Fucking is not a self-teaching aid. Instead it is a compilation of Kupferberg’s cartoons and collages which target journalism and people in power.
For those of you not in the know, Tuli Kupferberg gained fame as a member of the proto-punk art rock band The Fugs. He is also known for writing the classic hippie books 1001 Ways to Beat the Draft and 1001 to Live Without Working.
No one would accuse Kupferberg of being a talented illustrator, but his absurdist humor shines through his simple drawings. The work is filled with sexual imagery and language that make it definitely inappropriate for the kids. For instance, one work captioned at the bottom with “Hero Worship” is a crude drawing of a phallus. It appears directly opposite the drawing of a vagina labeled “The Land of Mystery.”
While Kupferberg’s best work is likely behind him, Teach Yourself Fucking is entertaining collection.
Naked Vinyl
02 years ago
by Todd
in Multimedia
Naked Vinyl front cover
By Tim O’Brien and Mike Savage
Published in 2002 by Universe Publishing
As a fan of cheesecake and vinyl records, I had high expectations for this book.
The album covers reproduced in Naked Vinyl are nicely printed on glossy paper and the decision to reduce the album images to the size of a 45 was a good one. Full-sized reproductions would make the book only suitable for a coffee table, but the reduced size still makes the images large enough to appreciate all of a record’s detail.
The book begins with a brief introduction to the galleries to follow with short explanations of stag, party, comedy, and exotica records. Unfortunately, the introduction is all too brief and not particularly informative. The galleries that follow are arranged in a mostly chronological order beginning in 1950s and ending in the 1980s.
Curiously, this is one book where I wish the illustrations were left to themselves without commentary. Or at least, I wish that the album covers included different commentary. My biggest complaint with this book is insightful information is given short shrift over corny jokes. The commentary would be much improved if it told me more about the artists, the music on the records, or even the art direction on the covers.
Overall though, this is a good book and a nice reference for collectors of cheesecake vinyl.
Jesus Christ: Serial Rapist
02 years ago
by Todd
in Multimedia
Directed by Bill Zebub
Released in 2005 by Bill Zebub
This review is the first I have ever done for something that I don’t have in my personal collection. It is also the first movie reviewed here. This is a hard movie to describe and harder still to review.
As I thought of what to say about it, my thoughts were informed by concepts like subversion and transgression. This isn’t because of what the film contains but rather because of what the film lacks. Even the most inept filmmaker includes elements like plot, setting, character development, narrative, and so forth. Despite protests from some corners, this is true even in porn. There’s a reason a cumshot can also be rightfully called a climax. Somehow Jesus Christ: Serial Rapist contains a savant-like genius because it contains virtually none of these elements.
It is as though the Zebub has thrown down the gauntlet and challenged the viewer to a mano-a-mano endurance contest. Where most directors might wish to challenge the audience to rethink their own values or worldview, Zebub’s opus is tacitly hostile towards its audience. The result is a trial of wills that even an Andy Warhol fan would be wise to not take.
Actually, that’s all wishful thinking. The best part of Jesus Christ: Serial Rapist is the title. The movie consists of a few random bondage scenes that introduces a slideshow all set to a droning death metal soundtrack. It’s a giant mess right from the beginning as the introductory title card (there’s no dialogue) contains a misspelling that gets things off on a confusing club foot.
The movie then goes tediously from one incoherent bondage scene to the next separated by title cards that are designed ostensibly to propel the story. Unfortunately, there isn’t a story to tell, or if there was one, the movie failed to communicate it. That’s not necessarily a bad thing; sometimes a plot ruins what would be otherwise enjoyable porn. Worse still, there’s nothing remarkably erotic, sexy, or even titillating about the scenes. It’s as though the camera cuts away before the foreplay even begins leaving us with an incoherent mess.
After we endure the pointless bondage scenes, the movie’s second half begins. It consists of bad crucifixion bondage photographs (many of which were badly Photoshopped). The title card that introduces this mess claims that video slideshow was sent to the police. I can only imagine them being interested in tracking down its creator to punish him for boring them with this tedium.
The version I saw of this was apparently a remake. As bad as this was to sit through, I shudder to think of how awful the original was if this was an improvement. After all was said and done this was an hour and a half of my life that I want to squander on something, anything, else. Other than people I dislike and porn addicts, who would find this the methadone of erotica, I hope no one else suffers the misfortune of sitting through this film.
Cinema Sewer
02 years ago
by Todd
in Multimedia
Cinema Sewer front cover
Edited by Robin Bougie
Published in 2007 by Fab Press
I don’t like comics. I suppose comics are fine if you are a little kid, but adults should have much better things to do than read comics.
I also don’t like going to the movies. If you catch me after I have stood in line, overpaid for a ticket, gotten raped at the concession stand, and endured the company of so many people who are using what might otherwise be precious air, you will catch me in a mood to join any revolution that calls for genocide. While I could watch movies at home, I rarely have the time and even more rarely have the inclination. Another hassle is that getting a good movie involves more energy than I care to invest. One problem is that there really aren’t many avenues available to get the sorts of movies that appeal to me. While some of you might be content to go to a certain national chain I won’t mention by name (it’s name rhymes with cock duster), I hold it in the same low esteem I hold traditional movie theaters.
Another thing that limits my movie watching is that few movies tickle my fancy. Even watching XXX movies is tedious. Porn is the kind of experience that should leave you feeling queasy and disturbed about humanity. Unfortunately, the supply of such fare is scant and the overwhelming majority of what the porn store stocks is a bore.
So what is someone that dislikes comics and movies doing reading this book? It’s simple: Bougie’s work is so good, I couldn’t put this down. Bougie’s talent as an artist and enthusiasm for his subject comes through on each and every page such that I reconsidered my aversion to comics and movies.
The pages of Cinema Sewer focus on coverage of obscure horror, low budget 60s and 70s exploitation, Hong Kong cinema, and (my personal favorite) classic and extreme pornography. Though Bougie’s love of extreme and obscure movies shines through in his writing, it doesn’t obscure his objectivity. When a film is good, Bougie’s excitement is contagious. If a film is bad, his criticism is biting, thought provoking, and entertaining.
While I could go on and on in singing the praises of Cinema Sewer, it is so good that you should experience it yourself. If you buy no other book this year, it should be this one. Truly the best book I have read in years.